• 6 Posts
  • 5.98K Comments
Joined 2 years ago
cake
Cake day: July 3rd, 2023

help-circle








  • jjjalljs@ttrpg.networktoScience Memes@mander.xyzI dunno
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    7 hours ago

    I like and respect teachers, but I’m a software developer and I’m telling you that adding extra parenthesis often adds clarity and makes the whole process smoother. You exist in a whole other context that has norms and assumptions that do not apply to what I’m talking about.

    You being technically correct is irrelevant.




  • jjjalljs@ttrpg.networktoScience Memes@mander.xyzI dunno
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    8 hours ago

    That’s because it’s already clear as is, as per the rules of Maths.

    More people evaluate 2+3x4 incorrectly than 2+(3x4). So, no, your answer does not hold up to my observed reality. You can throw as many “well technically” and “well actually” as you want, but that’s not going to fix the bug or make a pr.


  • Used hinge. It’s the least bad, as of this year anyway.

    Most people who use dating apps are, frankly, bad at it. People send garbage messages with garbage profiles. People half-ass it and expect the other folks to carry the whole thing. I feel like I could write a short book on how to do it better.

    Condensed into like three bullet points it’s

    • Ask questions. Do not dead-end the conversation and expect them to do all the work
    • actually ask them out. Like, in the first conversation after you clear any must-have deal breakers (eg: if you have a kid)
    • put stuff you want to talk about in your profile. Don’t be “clever” and respond to “what are you looking for?” with “my keys”. This is where you give the other person topics to talk about. (Also if you are tired of people asking about the stuff you put in your profile, change it you doofus.)

    Being “an introvert” doesn’t excuse you from being present and engaged. The other person isn’t going to be that interested in someone who responds every couple hours with “lol”. If you can’t muster up the energy to have a real conversation, you aren’t ready to date.




  • Part of that falls under the “don’t show up when invited” umbrella, but mostly that sucks. I’m sorry you feel like your efforts and friendship efforts weren’t appreciated.

    I’ve definitely had a couple friends (“friends”) that were lopsided. I remember posting about one way back in the 2000s on some web forum, and a guy with a otter(?) avatar told me “This guy, that flakes on your plans and only shows up when it works for him? He doesn’t respect you. Don’t put up with that”. Good advice from a small furry animal, I think.

    Some people just aren’t worth it. Maybe they were in the past. Maybe they will be again. But I find it’s important to have boundaries for oneself. It can be hard to balance.



  • A lot of our behaviors and coping mechanisms come from our parents. So if they’re lonely and have no friends, you should examine why that is, and try to change it in yourself.

    One of my friends realized after therapy they had a lot of behaviors from their dad. Stuff they hated when their dad did (lashing out when uncomfortable, mostly). Once they saw it, they were able to work on it. Before that, it had been a real source of friction with friendships.