They can propagandeez nuts. But seriously, you can’t advertise away higher electric bills and more expensive electronics in return for some shit nobody asked for.

Pearl Harbor

Metyr’s death animation alone deserves an honorable mention.

Okay, OP, what’s your favorite dinosaur? Mine’s the Triceratops.

Damn, this guy was all over the Epstein files. Shame we don’t know who it is.

Russia Antifa, if you’re listening…

Isn’t the vast majority of the open ocean effectively lifeless? 9/10 times you’d probably not even be within a mile of anything bigger than plankton.

Yet another story about Donald Trump where the headline could have been “Petty Little Bitch Makes Petty Little Bitch Move.”

Or, to keep it fresh, “Donald Trump Again Misses Opportunity to Fight Allegations of Being a Petty Little Bitch.”

Let’s have all billionaires receive that kind of welcome everywhere they go.

If you live in China or India, hand sightings only make the news if it lands on someone nearby. In Europe and the US, the hand heading your way means a few minutes on the news presenting the mathematical models predicting where it will land based on trajectory, and something like “John Johnson, a 34-year old Liverpool resident, was a victim of the inexorable hand yesterday. He will be missed.” For the likes of Iceland or New Zealand, the hand heading your way means a full day of tension and lots of wills being updated.

Whenever someone dies by crushing, detectives have to verify if the hand was spotted elsewhere at the time.

C’Tun Aket doesn’t deserve to have their feelings hurt like that. Uncool, bro.

She didn’t ask for the expiration date

Unironically one of the funniest “not the onion” headlines I’ve ever read. Usually they’re depressing.

For every day it’s delayed, I’ll assume it was because they had another 100 pages about Trump they had to redact.

Pythagoras coined the term “philosopher” and he lived only about 100 years before Plato, so they were a pretty new, cool thing. Wait, were philosophers who thought they had all the answers the tech bros of Ancient Greece?

Its a lot of work to separate all the stuff that incriminates Republicans from the stuff that incriminates everyone else. There’s so much that incriminates Republicans!

Every great boss in Sekiro is an old person in a profession where people die young.

Also Genichiro.

Fitting. Trump’s economy is Biden’s economy with a leg fallen off.

They yearn for the mines.