“You know, you’re a real up person”

The only sport I’m actually talented in is lacrosse, but it’s so goddamn bougie that no school I went to ever really supported it. I remember one time in PE we just kinda split the gym in half with floor hockey on one side and basketball on the other. My buddy and I went to grab sticks and we saw they had lacrosse equipment so we dug out a couple sticks and started tossing a ball around. Our teacher was like “Hey, I appreciate you two finding something you’re excited about, but it’s just not what we’re doing right now.”

It’s called Mount Rushmore, bud

Basketball. Which might not sound like a big deal, but when you’re tall like me, everyone wants you for the team. I can dribble, and I can pass (hot damn, can I pass) but I can’t shoot worth a damn and the most charitable thing anyone ever said about my defensive skills is that they’re “technically not illegal.”

Worse too is that it’s not like I’m bad at sports. They probably saw me making a decent go at baseball or soccer and thought “Even if he’s bad, we can teach him.” They could not.

Sorry, fellow jocks. Basketball just ain’t for me.

Nice story! Tell it to Reader’s Digest!

r/CTH got shuttered and I kept getting 3-day bans. I even got handed a 3-day ban immediately after I came off a 3-Day ban, both for interacting with “violent” content. So was completely unusable and all the Weird Facebook groups I was part of had really fallen off after 2019, so I was looking for an alternative and I can’t even remember how I found out about this place, but I did and I’m here now.

I stay because this place is like a hybrid of the old forums I used to hang out in, the Weird Facebook groups I hung out in more recently, and r/CTH. I’ve even ditched all other social media (unless Discord counts) because this place fulfills all the same needs, and in a way I feel is healthier. Thanks, Comrades!

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Wait when Trump says he’s going to bring back American manufacturing does he just mean “Jobs at Cheesecake Factory”?

Or he’d run with Harris as VP, get sworn in, and immediately resign.

Will you become somehow wetter when you enter the White House or will the drying accelerate?

Unfortunately, the average American voter is so thoroughly brainwashed that their only frame of reference is “Stuff didn’t get better, so let’s try the other guy.”

All Cats Are Baby

I don’t think anybody even likes Bethesda games for their genuine merits anymore. They’re fundamentally broken in ways that people find appealing for some reason.

Yeah, evil options in games are usually pretty underwhelming. It’s almost like developers put them there as a token nod to contrarians.

Ignoring all the slavery is clearly the evil option. This chud yearns to be part of the trade himself.

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Have you been withholding your piss?

Did you get touchy when they said the C-word that triggers the word filter?

How did they license this video of me playing guitar? Did my ex give the video over without telling me? Was there money involved?

1: All my decks are sorta vanilla. I guess the weirdest would be my Turbofog pauper deck

2: Friend of mine has a Commander deck built around voting and giving himself extra votes. He calls it “Democracy Manifest.”

3: I want to make a Commander deck with an abstract theme, and then I found out the artist behind a lot of cards in Boros colors is named Zoltan Boros. It’d ultimately be a Brion Stoutarm Fling deck, which I also want to make, but if I make Boros by Boros, I can kill 2 birds with one stone.

“And that band with the guitar nonce, they’re the who exactly?”

“Yes, exactly.”