I know for certain that I would kill a polar bear. Like, not even a question. Polar bears eat seals, and my diet consists primarily of highly processed food high in trans fats. I would clog the shit out of that polar bear’s arteries.

Without laughing.

I think I can fuck up a polar bear with bare hands.

I practice MMA for 7 years now, boxing in parallel for 6 years, I could. Not to count strength training at the gym for 4 years, 6ft 1 1/2 for 189 lbs.

I have an insane speed, reflexes similar to my speed. I just have to wait for him to charge me, dodge his attacks, and throw good punches to his head. I won’t stop, and at the smallest mistake he does, the polar bear is finished.

Reminds me of this: https://youtu.be/9G1aHkLHQ2I Sweaty palms warning.

Whatever bear is in Northern Canada gets tall enough to make muddy bear prints below the second floor of a house according to the mud prints on my friend’s house (one of those houses that go up and down at the entrance height). I was pretty young, so only now the cynical side of me wonders if it was real but we also had a bear trap set up on our road at one point so I assume it was, plus since there was a cutline behind our house we saw them there now and then. It was up on a mountain on a side road with like 10 houses and the town below was pretty small.

I don’t think it matters how big the bear is, it’ll fuck you up if it wants to cause they don’t come in tiny (compared to humans) and single. Oh yeah if you see a tiny one get the hell out of there cause mama isn’t far and she isn’t into socializing her cub.